The Start Up of You

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by Reid Hoffman and Ben Casnocha

This is the book, I got so excited to read and got so disappointed after reading it.

I was looking for a book, that can instill the curiosity in me, in terms of my profession. I was thinking, after few years working in a large bank, structure seemed to have gotten boring to me, and I wanted a shake up. I am looking for opportunities that excite me and push me. But, that’s when I thought, with the years in such a structured world, if I try to navigate an unstructured environment, won’t I break systems and reduce my self-confidence. So I leaned into structure again.

I thought maybe I can prepare my mindset, to acknowledge the gaps I have right now and prepare myself to delve into growth and uncertainty. The top recommendation was this book 😦

Do I regret reading it? No, I would never say I regret reading a book.
If I am honest, I did have few takeaways from the book. The first 3 chapters were truly eye opening for me.
Assessing oneself with regards to aspirations and abilities, was something I needed to work on. Plan A, Plan B and Plan Z – are something everyone should think at every point in life. I learnt those via this book.

But after that, it is only disappointment to me, Hoffman rightly created LinkedIn, because he believed that networking can take you to places in the professional world, not thought of before. He is absolutely right about it and I completely agree. After all, the world still revolves people and systems created by the people, gaining trust and networking is what brings you the unexpected, usually hard to get / find fruit.

Later on, the whole book was about networking in various forms and phases and examples of how networking saved and brought opportunities to people.

That’s why it was a disappointing read to me, I had an objective to get out of this book and it did not provide me that.

And after all, Hoffman, makes it sound so easy to network and everyone has or finds the time and prioritizes this. I have heard that this is mostly a silicon valley experience. I am from India and I live and work in India. This doesn’t apply as he narrates.

So, there is an underlying culture difference between the US and India, with respect to experimentation. After being under colonial rule, Indians have rightly been conservative in their approaches and have taken the beaten up path for financial incentives. With few businesses, that flourished from the 70s to 90s, most of them were of manufacturing sector and some of them were even created by families that were already wealthy and thriving in businesses, and after 2000, India utilized the software industry but in terms of offering services, rather than building in-house tech first products, which involves the capital and risk, that Indians are conservative about. Of course, there are few exceptions, but this is the larger picture.

With initiatives for funding start ups, and building a community for founders, India is now creating a budding atmosphere for startups and experimentation. Still, a large majority of people would prefer a huge stable paycheck, than building something of their own, on their own and take the risks involved. They can’t be blamed, there are numerous families, who are just trying to escape the trap of being poor and trying to build something for themselves first. After all, survey shows that inequality in wealth distribution is at an all time high.

With the introduction, now when I say, it is hard to network with people purely with fascination towards the field, hope you can understand. I have tried. But, Indians are labelled as people who just take care of all on the off-shore activities, and moreover with the speeches on why 70hr and 90hr workweeks are essential to create value, that are given by the entrepreneurs of the country, where is the time to look beyond work and connect with people genuinely?

This is absurd, I started writing it as book review, but I think I am enraged on how work-life balance in India is a joke. When someone stands up for it, they are often punished or labelled. While the whole western world tries to move towards 4 day work week, American hustlers thought it is a good idea to work 9 to 9 for 6 days a week, and Indians have been doing the same, for cheap for so long.

When the people in the other countries get to experience the time, lifestyle and health alongside the work that pays them for all of it, Indians lose their health, become insanely obese, lose time for family and friends, let alone networking for work, there are no words to describe the lifestyle India has to offer. Of course, quick commerce and delivery options are available, they are just other means of consumptions that Indians pay for the lack of time and energy they have after toiling at work and again, this is eventually going to make them pay more hospital bills as well. Where is the good air to inhale, less commute time and better roads for the taxes paid? After all this, of course, it is good idea to work 70hr, yes.

This article was not supposed to be a rant on the Indian workplace, but after reading the book, I can’t but, just be frustrated about how Indians lose opportunities that another part of the world sees as normal. Any human can innovate, with the needs and the space, but not with the lack of time. Ideas do get born out of desperation, but not out of lack of enthusiasm. It is time to get back enthusiasm.

Thanks Reid for selling LinkedIn in a book to me.

The God of Small Things

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The god of small things

By Arundhati Roy

I have always had this book on my TBR list and was excited to read it when I got the paperback. I have heard so much about the book before reading it. I thought I already knew the spoilers, but it turns out Arundhati Roy wrote it that way.

Before reading the book, I must say I have watched many interviews of the author – about the book and about her activism. I have liked her, I have grown fond of her, the way she articulates her thoughts, how she unapologetically and confidently expresses her opinions. I did go through her Wikipedia page previously to know more about her. When I started reading the book, I was confused to find her story in the starting chapters. It turns out, The God of Small Things is a semi-autobiographical novel.

I have now read this book at a time when her memoir Mother Mary Comes to Me has been launched and received a warm welcome. (I might pick up the new memoir someday.)

What’s the story about?

The God of Small Things won the Booker Prize, making Arundhati Roy the first to receive it for a debut novel. The story narrates the childhood and adulthood of twins (two-egg twins, as she stresses enough), and how their lives change entirely within a few days. I have a hard time condensing the plot without giving spoilers. The most important thread of it all is the life of the twins’ mother – her decisions, her childhood, and the love she had chosen – and how all of it was overpowered by the God of Big Things.

Things I must say

I loved the rich narration of Arundhati Roy; her writing was truly transformative. It is sad that the book still stays relevant today, given that casteism plays a major role – the Big Thing in the lives of the characters.

The brilliance of embedding comedy and a child’s perspective into such a serious and nerve-breaking theme is what made me understand the reason behind the wide acclaim for this work. I must say I wasn’t planning to write a glorious review of this book. But when I start finding words to express what I feel, these are the words that find their way.

The Writing – (Spoilers)

Small things are human nature – the longing for love, belonging, and happiness. Big things are the pillars and structures that humans have built for no clear reason but to maintain authority, including casteism and racism.

The author shows clearly how the God of Small Things is crushed when the Big Things take the stage – and it is always the Big Things that get the center stage.

That’s what careless words do. They make people love you a little less.

Not something a child would want to listen from her mother, and wonder if her mother loves her less. If her mother and her uncle, would always love the cousin of her more, a white girl more. Will she have to always wonder at things and be not careless in her childhood. Would she have to run away from people who constantly remind her, that she and her mother have no place in the house they live.

Estha Alone is a phrase often written by Arundhati, depicting how the child, in every sense, was left to figure out his own path. Be it the abuse he had to endure, the return he had to walk through – leaving his family, his world – with no guide but himself. Not a single word was uttered by him throughout the adult phase of his life. When he is returned, he simply admires his sister, finds the beauty of his mother in her, and holds the pain both women had to endure. No glimpse is offered into his inner world, yet his seems the shakiest of all, the most tumultuous.

The notion that a woman stops belonging to the family she was born into once she is married is one of the most depriving ideas a society can hold on to. Again, the Big Thing wins, and Ammu is left with no support or right to belong anywhere – only to suffer.

Life would be much easier if the Big Things could take a step back, and if we stopped giving them the space they least deserve. For all the time humans have known, we have fought – and for what? We die after all of it, leaving behind only memories in the minds of others who are also bound to die.

This book is great – thought-provoking, touching, and something that instills fear and anger at the same time.

The Body Keeps the Score

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The first read of this year and a very thought-provoking one. The trauma, the lingering effects of the trauma on people’s lives, even after it ended up being a long time ago.

This book was written around 10 years ago. It comprises Bessel Van Der Kolk’s years of research and things he learnt through networking with people working on the same side of things.

What’s it about?

The book starts with Bessel’s encounter with Vietnam War US soldiers. Their dreams reminding them of the horrors in the war field, picture-perfect. The harsh environments and dreary circumstances of losing close friends in front of their eyes, and their helpless anger destroying Vietnamese children and women during the war – all these make living a normal life difficult.

Studies on trauma and the underlying effects it leaves in the brain, the shutting down of the rational part of the brain during such incidents. Losing language, senses, and the conscious feeling of thinking things through at the time of the trauma have been found to be a common scenario.

Bessel goes on to paint a clear picture of the trauma that children in unfortunate circumstances and households have had to endure and how the effects of it still affect them in leading an adult life. While war soldiers clearly showed signs of PTSD (Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder), sexually abused children have dissociation to deal with in all walks of their life.

Bessel stresses the difficulty and the time it takes to find the exact underlying phenomenon beyond the common symptoms that people mention. The test of time to name the phenomenon and establish its credibility amidst clinical professionals and society, especially in the courtroom, has been really challenging, and it takes a lot of consistent perseverance from the research community.

It is surprising to understand how much the body and brain act out to protect and react to a certain situation or long exposure to something the mind is not ready for. There are instances where abused children completely forget the incidents where they have been abused unless they are reminded of the very circumstances and the senses their brain associates with them. The character they develop to mask it out of their life, memory, and body helps them only for a while, when they eventually have to bring the disturbing fact underneath them all and handle it without re-living it. Bessel found that resurfacing memories associated with trauma sometimes makes the person re-live them – the pain, the smell, the senses – that are all associated together. This may retrigger their defense mechanism and might send them back to their old undesirable ways.

The quest to make them live a normal life has been a several-decades-long effort by several researchers. Some of the treatments, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Neurofeedback, EMDR, and also yoga, improv, and meditation, have helped victims stay in touch with their body and mind and recover without reliving the trauma.

The whole book was eye-opening, and it was brutal to see the victims, mostly children, and their struggles to lead a normal life, in spite of no fault of theirs.

Drill down

There was this particular story of a director of nurses in a hospital (Nancy) that affected me a lot. Unlike any other victims mentioned, Nancy’s circumstances do not start with an explicit war or abuse scenario. She was getting her laparoscopic tubal ligation surgery after giving birth to her third child. The anesthesia started wearing off in the middle of her surgery, and she was able to feel every pain, but she felt paralyzed to move or voice it out, and the sense of blood gushing from her body and the tubes being cut were etched in her mind. She was having flashbacks of it, couldn’t explain what she felt or did not feel even days and months after the surgery. She took on a completely different character, where she got annoyed by little things and couldn’t find joy in living life even in glorious moments.

This story was particularly too scary because it can happen to anyone. You need not enlist to go to war, be brought up in a struggling household, meet with an accident, be in foster care, or be left behind for church classes. I am sure I can’t compare the circumstances or weigh them, but when I was reading, this particular story affected me a lot. How someone can identify such a scenario and its impacts needs attention at all levels.

What do I make of the book

Bessel makes sure to clearly account for the years of research, circumstances, and the failures to arrive at something helpful for the victims. It definitely leaves hope behind in the last few chapters of the book, reading some of the successful stories of people who did come out of their trauma and started leading a normal life.

Though it does show that not any or all treatments are guaranteed to work for certain patients, and it sometimes comes down to trial and error for some who have had to endure with nothing but hope in their hands.

The book felt too focused on children and the effects of trauma on their adult life. It could have had a lot more clarity on how to handle things when it comes to adults, to prevent trauma. I understand a few circumstances are non-preventable – accidents and mishaps in surgery – and the brain does lose its function for a while, yet I would have loved to know about research in that direction. (Breathwork does help, I guess, but will it in all scenarios?)

The book does emphasize treating trauma as a whole entity that affects body, brain, and mind, and not just dealing with the mind, which was the most essential and missed-out part in treating it. The book does give hope of getting all good, even after life puts you down a long set of stairs.

Overall, the book was a good read to me, but I am not sure why I came across people on the internet saying their therapist recommended reading this book before beginning their recovery. This book condenses too much trauma in its pages for them not to get triggered. This book gives a good brief to people without a clinical or research background to better understand the accounts and eventually make better decisions when it comes to dealing with people who require help.

Lives of women – Kang Kyŏng-ae

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The Underground Village

I am currently reading  Kang Kyŏng-ae’s The Underground Village. It is a short story collection. I have read the first couple of stories. However, something in those stories stirred my heart, prompting me to write this article.

Before delving into the stories, it is important to know about Kang Kyŏng-ae. She is a Korean author who focuses on portraying the lives of Koreans, especially women from an impoverished community. Kang’s pro-feminist writings reflect the hardships of women in a colonial and patriarchal world.

The first story is called Manuscript Money. In this story, a woman writes to her friend ‘K’ about earning 200 won from a newspaper for her work. She wishes to buy things for herself like a fur coat, a gold watch, and even dental work, with the money earned. But her husband urges her to spend the money on others, for instance, helping in medical aid for a comrade. The woman goes on to write her friend about the obligation she is bound to, spend money on society and not herself.

The second story is called Salt. In this story, a woman and a man live with their son and daughter. When one of their children asks for a shoe, the woman explains the toil they have to go through, just to feed themselves. The woman loses her husband to the exploitation of labor. Her son disappears, and she is left with her daughter. She lives in Manchuria, as one of the many ethnic Koreans who were displaced during the Japanese occupation of Korea. She knows no one and no place, and she ends up seeking refuge from the very man who exploited her husband. She does domestic chores in his household. She gets sexually exploited by the man and also gets pregnant. But she gets kicked out of the house along with her daughter by the wife and the landlord, after knowing that the son of the woman was killed by the communists. She then gives birth to a girl child. She nurses a baby not of her own, and she makes money from her breast milk. Her daughters spend all their time alone, while the elder daughter goes through a hard time bringing up her baby sister, without her mother. Tragically, she loses both her daughters to illness, and she also loses the right to see the baby she nursed all the while. She has no will to live, but the starvation competes with her zeal to die. She then smuggles salt, merely to live her life, and that also ends badly.

The parallels from the stories are quite interesting. Both stories revolve around how a woman is viewed, her self vs the community, the control of a man over a woman, guilt, loss, and the survival of a woman from an impoverished community.

In Manuscript Money, the woman is made to believe that she is selfish for spending her earned money on herself. She is torn between self-care and community. In salt, the woman has no control over money or even her body. While the male partner dictates how her money should be spent, the landlord in the latter story exploits the woman’s body. The women in both stories feel guilty at the end of the day. In the former, she feels evil for just wanting her own money and wanting to live well. In the latter, the woman feels guilty for just being alive, after the loss of everyone in her family; she survives by instinct and has lost everything.

Kang’s words echo the hold of patriarchy in an already oppressed society. Mere survival of Korean women during the Japanese occupation was made difficult by double oppression. Her stories depict the systems and the values they associate with women. The silent suffering of the women during those times, whose values were in serving others, and whose existence was punishable, was alive in the stories.

I am excited to read the other stories!

I found a book that will stay close to my heart – All My Mothers

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All My Mothers

All My Mothers by Joanna Glen

When Eva finds no photos of herself before the age of three, she begins to suspect that she may have been born to a different mother. As she connects the dots—the absence of early photographs, the emotional distance between her and the woman she calls “mother,” and the flimsy reasons given for those missing years—her doubts deepen.

What Eva truly longs for is a sense of motherly love—the kind she sees Bridget, her friend, receive so freely. In a charming touch, she begins comparing the women in her life to those in a children’s book she reads at school, The Rainbow Rained Us, where different kinds of mothers are described using colors. In this world, her mother is a “pink mother,” while Bridget’s is clearly a “blue mother.”

This book unfolds as a poignant coming-of-age story. Eva’s father is often absent, and when she stumbles upon a childhood photo taken in a Spanish patio—featuring a woman whose head is cut off from the image—a mysterious fondness for Spain begins to take root. Life leads her to places she has yearned for, and to others she never chose.

I have never related to a fictional story the way I related to All My Mothers. The ache of searching for motherly love while having a mother is a quiet, difficult feeling to explain—let alone admit to anyone. You start looking for love, approval, or warmth from other adult women in your life. And as time passes, you may find yourself drawn more deeply into friendships, searching for the kind of companionship your heart longs for. Eva’s story isn’t very different.

Throughout her journey, she categorizes every woman she meets into a type of mother from The Rainbow Rained Us. Along the way, she encounters various forms of love and learns to find beauty in fleeting moments. Joanna Glen does a brilliant job subtly expressing the idea that love is everywhere—you only need to start looking for the essence of it.

The descriptions of architecture, especially in Cordoba, are vivid and transportive. Glen’s writing creates a virtual tour of Spain, igniting curiosity in the reader. Her lyrical style brings places to life and makes them feel within reach.

What I especially loved was how the story progressed through Eva’s evolving friendships, her romantic experiences, and the many beautiful relationships she forges. Glen captures the quiet presence of regret that comes with losing a loved one. The way she conveys the grief—tinged with confusion—is one of the most accurate and tender portrayals I’ve read.

If you enjoy coming-of-age stories with elegant narration and rich, atmospheric detail, I highly recommend this book. It gave me chills in the best way, especially during some of Eva’s most profound experiences.

Life is a journey filled with lessons, questions, doubts, and beautiful answers—each shaped by perspective. This book is a gentle, powerful reminder of that.

Rating: 4.5/5

The Obstacle is the Way – My First Read on Stoicism

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The Obstacle is the Way by Ryan Holiday is my first introduction to Stoicism. Though this book isn’t often labeled as a typical Stoic read, I found it to be a great starting point. I had previously attempted to read Meditations by Marcus Aurelius but felt overwhelmed—it was difficult to grasp the concepts fully. So, I decided to begin with an easier read, something similar to a self-help book. And this book turned out to be exactly what I was looking for.

Initially, I considered sharing just the quotes from the book. No matter how I wrote about it, I felt I might take away the crispness or the essence of its ideas. But I also wanted to comprehend it better by putting my thoughts into words.

This post isn’t a review. Instead, it’s my way of organizing my reflections on the book and analyzing where I stand.

The book is divided into three sections—Perception, Action, and Will. Ryan Holiday has summarized it wonderfully on his YouTube channel (after all, who can summarize a book better than the author himself?).

Philosophy is best incorporated through practice. To manifest it in action, it must first take root in our thoughts. I believe that cultivating a Stoic mindset is essential to truly practicing Stoicism. So, here’s my humble interpretation of the book in a few words.

Perception

The title itself hints at its core idea—seeing an obstacle as an opportunity is the perspective shift that makes all the difference. The world is often unfair, but dwelling on that fact doesn’t help much. Everyone faces their own set of obstacles, and what truly matters is how we perceive them.

It’s crucial to distinguish between what’s within our control and what isn’t. In both cases, managing our emotions is equally important. It’s not about suppressing emotions but about taming them. Viewing situations objectively, as they are, helps navigate setbacks effectively.

I tend to sympathize with myself a lot. But Stoicism preaches clarity. Sympathy might provide temporary comfort, but clarity guides us toward emotional control and a better perspective. A clear, rational mindset—free from impulsive reactions—helps us shift our attitude toward problems and uncover opportunities within them.

Action

This section is my favorite—probably because it’s the one I need to practice the most. I’ve been an overthinker for most of my life. I’ve even read books to help me stop overthinking because it was ruining my peace of mind. But deep down, I always knew that the most effective solution would be action.

Action kills overthinking. When you do something, you get results—either it works, or it doesn’t. And that alone eliminates unnecessary thoughts. (Of course, not every thought needs to be acted upon.)

The chapters in this section felt like a wake-up call. The first one states that no aid will be received; it’s our deliberation, boldness, and persistence that truly matter.

It’s a cliché: To reach your goals, stop complaining and face your problems head-on. But practicing it is far harder. I often find myself complaining about setbacks. On some days, I can see them positively—if not for these challenges, I wouldn’t have learned certain things. But not every day feels like that.

I tell myself it’s okay to fail, but I wonder if I’ve ever truly given myself permission to fail. Failure seems daunting to me, yet Ryan explains that failure is the price we pay for learning—the discomfort and disappointment we experience are simply tuition fees for our lessons. That’s an interesting perspective. Let’s see if I can absorb it!

Since we’ve established that there’s no way forward except through obstacles, the next question is how to approach them. The answer? Break them down into doable steps, start working on them, and stop aiming for perfection. That includes tackling the tasks that feel uncomfortable.

Sometimes, in our desperation to achieve something, we dig ourselves into a deeper rut, making it harder to get out. I resonate with this. I also wonder if this is where detachment comes in.

Some things take time—like marinating chicken before cooking. Rushing through a process and expecting immediate results might ruin the whole dish. Maybe I need to practice patience and detachment. I sometimes wonder if this is a generational issue. With technology, everything is available at our fingertips within seconds—no more going to libraries and flipping through books to find an answer. Has this erased the art of patience? Hmm. Food for thought!

Just do it. And if it goes wrong, embrace that too.

Will

I’ve always thought of myself as a resilient person. But recent events in my life have made me question that belief. This section offers a deeper understanding of true resilience.

The adversities faced by Abraham Lincoln and his ability to say, This too shall pass, despite hardships, summarize this section well.

Perseverance is the action plan for willpower. It’s about sticking to something—not just until it’s possible, but until it’s right.

Most of the time, things don’t go our way, no matter how perfectly we execute our plans. There will always be external disruptions, and navigating through them requires willpower.

Final Thoughts

If you’re looking for a perspective shift or simply need motivation to view life differently, I’d recommend this book. It’s a great read for those seeking clarity in how they approach obstacles.

Let me know if you’d like me to continue reading more about Stoicism. Feel free to drop your suggestions as well!

Yellowface by R.F. Kuang: A Satirical Punch to the Publishing Industry

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Who owns a story?

This is the thought lingering in my mind after reading Yellowface. R.F. Kuang, after her widely acclaimed dark academia novel Babel, ventures into satirical literary fiction, focusing on the publishing industry.

The book features a small cast of characters—June Hayward, an aspiring writer, and her friend Athena Liu, a successful author. Athena dies in an accident, and June discovers her unpublished manuscript. Believing it to be Athena’s final work, June takes it upon herself to get it published. However, beneath this decision lies a deeper truth—June has long harbored mixed feelings about Athena’s success. More often than not, she sees Athena as privileged from the start.

June goes on to publish Athena’s work under her own name, justifying her actions by convincing herself that she put in the effort necessary to complete it. She struggles with guilt but eventually frames herself as the victim, feeling as though the world is against her and that no one could possibly understand her reasoning. She argues that the publishing industry favors “diverse” writers and stories like Athena’s, while white American authors like herself are increasingly sidelined.

After a while, the book becomes unsettling. For me, it blurred the lines between reality and fiction. The internet is flooded with book reviews and critiques, and in many ways, it is a democratic space—anyone with access can share their thoughts and opinions. Personally, I hesitate to call myself a reviewer, as I mostly write about my personal takeaways after finishing a book. I understand that reviewing literature is nuanced and requires a careful approach. That’s why I found Kuang’s portrayal of online reviews as a major metric for literary success somewhat shortsighted.

In my opinion, Yellowface is not truly satirical. Rather, it feels like a culmination of Kuang’s own thoughts and perceptions of the publishing industry. It’s blunt—perhaps even biased—especially considering that Kuang herself has had a relatively successful publishing journey compared to her peers. As I continued reading, I found myself less focused on the book’s themes of racism and cultural appropriation and more preoccupied with the limited, one-dimensional perspective of the industry. At times, it was difficult to read because Kuang struggled to fully establish her characters as either right or wrong.

That being said, don’t get me wrong—I thoroughly enjoyed the book. It’s gripping, and I couldn’t stop myself from turning the pages. Kuang’s vivid narration and rich details are irresistible. Through Yellowface, I gained insight into the hidden workings of the publishing world and how stories make their way to readers.

Rating: 4/5

Reflections on Time and Loss: A Review of Mrs. Dalloway

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Virginia Woolf’s Mrs. Dalloway is a poignant exploration of time, memory, and the intricate web of human emotions. The novel, set on a single day, follows Clarissa Dalloway as she prepares for a party she is hosting that evening.

Since it is not a linear narration, it took me a lot of time to grasp what Woolf was trying to convey. But it is because of this stream-of-consciousness narrative, it was easier to put the inner lives of the characters, their deepest fears, regrets, and desires on the table.

Peter Walsh and the love

The character of Peter Walsh stands out as particularly compelling and relatable, especially during times of personal sadness and introspection. Peter, who returns to England after years in India, is haunted by his unrequited love for Clarissa. His emotions are raw and palpable, and his continued love for Clarissa, despite their separation, is both heartbreaking and deeply human. His loneliness and the sense of being adrift in his own life resonate powerfully, especially when one is navigating similar feelings of loss and longing.

Clarissa herself is a complex character, embodying the tension between societal expectations and personal desires. On the surface, she appears to be the perfect hostess, concerned with the minutiae of her party. However, beneath this façade lies a woman who constantly questions her choices and grapples with the paths not taken. Her reflections on her past, particularly her youthful romance with Sally Seton, reveal her inner conflicts and the sacrifices she has made for the sake of convention.

The marriage of Rezia, Septimus and trauma

Woolf masterfully intertwines the lives of her characters, using the passing hours of the day to reveal their interconnectedness. Septimus Warren Smith, a shell-shocked World War I veteran, serves as a stark counterpoint to Clarissa’s world of privilege and social engagements. His descent into madness and eventual suicide highlight the devastating effects of war and the inadequacy of society’s response to mental illness. Septimus’ plight underscores the fragility of the human mind and the tragic consequences of a world that fails to understand or care for its wounded souls.

The novel’s structure, shifting seamlessly between past and present, inner thoughts and external actions, creates a rich tapestry of human experience. Woolf’s prose is lyrical and evocative, capturing the fleeting nature of time and the way our lives are shaped by memories and moments of connection. Her portrayal of London is vivid and immersive, bringing the city to life as a character in its own right, teeming with life and history.

Mrs. Dalloway is a deeply sad novel, reflecting the inherent melancholy of existence. Yet, it also offers moments of profound beauty and insight. The characters’ struggles with their pasts, their fears for the future, and their search for meaning in the present are universal themes that resonate across time and place.

Peter Walsh’s enduring love for Clarissa, despite its futility, speaks to the enduring power of love and the pain of unfulfilled dreams.

In conclusion, Mrs. Dalloway is a masterful exploration of the human condition, capturing the complexity of our emotions and the passage of time. Virginia Woolf’s ability to delve into the inner lives of her characters with such sensitivity and depth makes this novel a timeless classic. For anyone who has experienced loss, love, and the search for meaning, Mrs. Dalloway offers a profound and moving reflection on the beauty and sadness of life.

Rating: 4/5

Image credits : https://www.pinterest.com/pin/10062799137721033/

Green Dot

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By Madeleine Gray

Hera is a 24 year old woman, who holds 3 degrees, probably because she doesn’t want to work. Maybe this is not the best way to describe Hera. Let me start again.

Hera is a 24 year old woman, who is trying hard to figure out what she wants out of life, her life. She has no interest in working, unlike her friends. And ends up pursuing more degrees to evade from it. She is a smart girl, who is self-aware. But she doesn’t get along the ways how the world works.

A Short Summary

She then decides, she still can’t pose studying and applies for a job. It is a content moderator job, in a newspaper firm. And she gets it. Her boss Alison, has been working for so long in the same job, that she has kind of become mechanical on how stuffs should work in the office. There is a clear divide in the office between the journalists and the content moderators. Hera doesn’t like any inch of this place or the job, but finds Mei Ling’s company in internal IM rather helpful in crossing each day.

She shares a close relationship with her dad. Her dad is one of the most pleasant characters the book has to offer. The three of them, along with Jude, their dog, have a warm home. Hera’s social circle works for hang outs, but she is most close to Soph and Sarah, among the women nothing stays a secret.

Hera meets Arthur in her office, who is a journalist and starts talking to him. Things develop between the two interestingly. Hera quickly becomes the other woman and the tone is set for the rest of the book.

It’s about….

Green Dot goes further along the lines of Hera’s love, adultery, confusion and self introspection.

Hera is left with a constant chaotic spiral. Throughout all this, she still has her friends and her dad caring for her and supporting her, irrespective of the bad decisions she ends up taking. How she tackles incessant disappointments and guilt, takes decisions – the role of her feelings in them and the consequent events lay down the trajectory of the story.

Green Dot is a very interesting read, if you like reading about the affairs, desolation and dry humor.

Personally, this is my first book of such a theme, and it left me wondering often. It gave me new perspectives of things I have never given a thought before. The coming of age story seems pretty normal in the first few chapters and goes on to become a heart-wrenching one.

Madeleine Gray has done a great job in creating an introspecting novel, with her attempt to nail down every sentence to perfection.

Rating: 4/5

3 books that made me Self – Introspect

RajashreeLeave a comment

Self Introspection is an inward-looking process where one tries to find what their own mind and emotions convey. Self Reflection and introspection differ in that, reflection often involves trying to understand the values and goals behind one’s actions whereas, introspection is about finding the inner desires and motivations. Introspection mostly involves looking inwards by meditation or sometimes having a time by self.

The books that encouraged me look inward, made me self reflect as well. Not all times, do our actions align with our selves.

1. Love for Imperfect Things: How to Accept Yourself in a world striving for perfection – Haemin Sunim

This book was very kind to me, starting with self-care and it later moves on to the other aspects of life, which we overlook at that moment, but return back to them in memories. I would say it all starts with self-compassion, when I read the first part of the book, I was completely hooked, it made me view myself in a different way. I tried to be more accepting of myself and I tried to push myself forward with a small nudge, rather than beating myself up in the process.

The fact that relationships require effort, and it is sometimes fine, if we end up hurting others, meaning, we can’t be the 100% always someone expects of us and that is how it is. But, we must value others in the same time, it is not about being indifferent to others, it is more of value others and ourselves to take in.

Life is short and the world is whole lot larger. It is good to fail, even more better to heal.

When we become kinder to ourselves, we can become kinder to the world

2. Don’t Believe everything you think – Joseph Nguyen

I saw this everywhere as a tonic to overthinking, and it was precisely that.

The book starts with explaining, how pain and suffering differ. Pain is something that occurs often out of our control, but the latter is always under our control. It’s we who choose to suffer the pain or not.

The interpretation of the events define our perception and hence we choose to suffer or let go. It is our thinking that leads to it, rather than the thoughts themselves. Thoughts occur, but the thinking is our interference of them. We don’t have to think positively. We simply need not think at all. The author goes on explaining his point, with few exercises as well.

Our feelings guide us. The feelings that come above the surface when we are tranquil, devoid of anxiety. When we reach a state of no thought, otherwise termed as flow state, what we feel is often the answer for the questions we might have in mind. And this is how, we take the decisions, eliminating the thinking.

To be honest, it is very hard to practice this. It might sound simple, but not easy. I do overthink at times, switching off when the thinking carries me somewhere is tedious. But it has paid off well, when I did try.

There is nothing either good or bad but thinking makes it so

3. The Subtle Art of Not giving a F*ck: A Counterintuitive Approach to Living a Good Life – Mark Manson

This book’s tone is completely different from the above two, but meets them in the objective. I loved this book, because it was too straightforward at times. While the other books were gentle, this book calls you upon the wrong doings.

I have read Mark Manson’s blog before and liked some of those articles as well. Haemin Sunim said that suffering is your call, Mark Manson kind of meets at the same point and puts forward that it is because of the pain you learn and grow.

Being self-compassionate shouldn’t mean to keep you safe everywhere and be cautious. It is the opposite, it is the daring to do the things, choosing what you really value. When you can choose what you value, the other things become the last things on the planet and that’s how you eliminate giving a f*ck to them.

Mark puts forward five values – Responsibility, Doubts on self-beliefs, Failure, saying No, Commitment

These are kind of correlated if you try to elaborate. In that, taking responsibility to the actions and words, we might end up failing a lot. That only shows that we are trying and it is how you choose to take a hold on life. Failure makes us doubt what we believe, and hence we take those steps we hesitated before, assuming. Commitment and saying No go hand in hand. Getting a no, often leads to better things, or even if it doesn’t, it makes us see the world differently and better than before.

All in all, it was a packed book in itself and I loved every chapter of it.

In conclusion, self-help books are great when you need a piece of advice from someone. But the true impact lies in taking in and following them which you think might be helpful. If not, they are simply the rant of someone in a metro, you act like you care when you listen, but forget the minute you step out of the metro. It has got nothing on you.